A few weeks
ago I was in West Hollywood; gay palooza I love it! A friend and I were going
into one of our favorite bars for the cheap drinks, casual attire, and close
proximity to where we live anyway. I mean we got two drinks for $9 bucks can’t
go wrong huh? On top of everything parking is a breeze, free with no valet, and
always parking either on the side or in the back. We’re heading in and the
security guard is no other than a butched up, heavy set Asian lesbian who stands
at almost 6 ft. She is wearing jean shorts that come past her knees and a jean
cut off with a wife beater under it. Some sneakers, smoking a cigarette and she
is who we must past to join the other mo’s in the bar.
I am
thinking in my mind, wow this is one scary butch. Really, I wouldn’t want to
piss her off she would knock a bitch into next week. If two homo’s were bitch
slapping each other; she easily could break up that cat fight. I just find it
amazing that this whole bar, with about 98% being gay guys, throw in a couple
hags and this bar hires her to woop anyones ass who is disrupting the ora of hot
guys; either getting lit hoping for a number if not actually putting one of
those free condoms to use!
As my
friend and I walk up she smiles in a friendly manner and offers us a cigarette.
We both politely decline, I don’t smoke and my friend is too anxious to get her
Rum and Coke on. Walking into the bar we pass the rest rooms that by the way
have a hole at eye level. That creeps me out, whenever I have to use it I have
her watch the door, could you imagine being the fool who has to take a huge
dump and someone looks through the hole? Now I wouldn’t take a dump at a bar
but maybe a good piss. She notices the hanging box with all the free condoms
and lube and is like oh lets grab a bunch. As we check out the condom packages
they all have different LA designs and she keeps them. Not to use but for souvenirs;
she is a weirdo. We order some drinks, a Rum and Coke for her and a Tequila
Sunrise for me. You can’t go wrong at $9 bucks for two drinks right? After one
more drink we end up heading out for the night. I had work in the morning as
usual must teach little Suzy how to sit a bump at the rising trot cause I need
a paycheck.
On our way
out we pass the security guard once more. I think it is wonderful that she can
have a great career as a door “woman” at a gay bar and be truly successful at
it. She has the presence of Vin Diesel and has the voice to match it. When she
says “have a good night, you guys and behave yourself” I get anxious, like a
little kid who did something they shouldn’t have done. I have no idea why? Clearly I am 27 plenty
old enough to go out drinking responsibly but still that voice of hers makes me
nervous coming from a woman. Now if she looked like Vin Diesel I might instead
of being anxious become a bit more excited. If she had the body to match it
well than hi ho silver I might ride that pony real good nice and forward too.
No comments:
Post a Comment